Sunshine

What am I living for?

Is this reality or my dream?

I end up on my knees most of the time

Just a way of hope and continuation

But when I wake up from this

Will I remember last night?

Or am I just walking in the same place?

I can pray and pray for things to go right

But what do I have when I lost my sunshine

My sunshine and only sunshine

To make me happy when my skies are grey

When I stand alone

Am I a statue

Or just a turtle on a highway?

Am I facing my reality
Or just a blurred line?

Our Obsessions

Please don’t talk to me
When I’m too gone to remember
Please don’t love me
I can’t talk all through November
It’s funny how an asset
Becomes a part of you
I can’t seem to love me alone
How will I love you?
How will I stop myself from falling apart?
When everything is gone
I’ll be alone in the cold
I don’t want to think about what it’s like
To smile and turn away
When I've inhaled too much
I don’t remember it again
And everything is spinning
When I don’t think at all
I won’t think of you
I won’t think of your smile
I’ll think of the green mile
I’ll think of my spoiled heart
Turned to a chunk of coal
My future rearranged and my smile as well
My drugs and alcohol
My dreams and eyeliner smears
My love
My want
My needs
My life in your hands!
My pieces left to break
And crack to a pile of ash…

Don't forget...

Lipstick

I hear cries in the dead of night

I know I always fail to listen

My legs give up

My hands will shake

And I know my cup is empty

Many missed calls

Many unread texts

Because I don’t want to face

The ruing of my childish days

You wonder why I don’t return

I can’t find the words

I can’t find the empathy

To tell you I’ll never hear your voice

I’ll mourn the day I hear you cry

But only under my deepest shadow

I won’t respond

I won’t come back

When I stain my book and farewell

I have remorse

But no remorse

To the nights I cry to sleep

Only because my tears are the only thing

To cradle me in my sorrows

Selfish

I feel energy run when I think

Darkness surrounding me

Foreplay of my finale

Thoughts confuse me

From multiple perceptions

I may be selfish, you say

But have I ever been?

A selfless life

A life of interrogation

But what has ever been to my benefit?

I think to myself

It may be okay to be selfish

Just for this once

Because it would be the first time

And it would be the last time

Reason

I know my reason

When I hear the birds of a fall breeze

The brisk wind kissing my body

It reminds me

Life is a beautiful canvas of perception

Just as reason is

Reason is beautiful

Perception is beautiful

Life is beautiful

Plastic

What’s it like

To be a mannequin?

Everything is perfect

In the world of plastic

Fine designer clothes

Fancy plastic hair

But what is a life

With no problem at all?

Is it wrong to enjoy

Life’s various problems?

Think of it this way

Rather live life

With a spice of drama

Than a flavorless fruit

On a colorless tree

Minuscule

Every time you strive for the kill

You end with the battle scars

It seems like a fire always loses its spark

In the rain of a broken heart

Serenity loves to play with my mind

I swear it almost devours me

But I’m out of money and care of the day

I’m a bug in the sap of a tree